Weddings Across the Water

Admit it; it's crossed your mind. "Wouldn't the weather be much more predictable in the Bahamas? Would Uncle Jed's break dancing girlfriend be inclined to stay home rather than fly to Mexico?" The idea of a destination wedding can be attractive to many-the-bride for many-the-reason. If you've tallied the pros and cons and are warming up to the idea of a passport-required ceremony, read on. This one's for you.

Breaking the News

The deed is done: You and your fiancé have decided on a destination wedding. Time to tell the gang. When Melissa Polodna and her then-fiancé, Tony Polodna, decided to get married in the Bahamas, she remembers her parents being excited. "They hadn't been on vacation in forever, and when they did the mental math, they realized it would be a lot cheaper than my sister's wedding," she says. Her advice: Let the family know they can still be part of your special day. "We were worried that some of our friends couldn't afford it, but a lot of them just decided to use the time to take their vacations," Melissa says. "It was perfect."

June bride Rachelle Scott says her grandmother was skeptical of the idea at first. "Her sister finally convinced her to come with us to Mexico, and these two 80-year-olds ended up being the highlight of the trip," she says.

Assemble Team Destination Wedding

When it comes to wedding planning, every bride knows it's tough to go it alone. When it comes to international wedding planning, it's not just tough; it's practically impossible. Rachelle identifies the essential team leader: the travel agent. "I must have called her a million times," Rachelle says of her travel agent, Karen Allen of Great Southern Travel. "Not only was she booking for me and my fiancé, but for our 16 guests."

When it comes to finding cheap flights with the right times in the right places for large groups of people, the travel agent is the only way to go says Leslie Yearta, whose destination wedding in Hawaii required the help of a travel agent at Admiral Travel. "Our agent would identify things I didn't have time to consider, like renting a car when we got there," Leslie says. She recommends contacting a number of travel agencies to find the right one for your needs.
Once you've found the travel agent, it's time to make the decision about location. Leslie says the Internet is the best resource for exploring all-inclusive resorts, "I looked at the photos of Hanalei Bay and was hooked." Melissa found her all-inclusive resort on the Sandals website, choosing to hold her Bahamas wedding at the Sandals Royal Bohemian Spa Resort. "You don't have to think about the details because it's all included," she says. "Totally took off the stress." (Certainly the spa helped with that, too.)

After the travel agent has booked the flights, hotel and car rentals, the next team member comes into play: the destination wedding planner. Worried about how to say "hydrangea" in Spanish? Don't sweat it. "These people do this every day," says Rachelle, whose wedding in Cancun was one of eight weddings held there that day. Most all-inclusive resorts, such the Moon Palace resort where Rachelle held her wedding, offer a number of packages with choices about food, flowers, music, video, transportation and seating. "I simply chose which one I wanted, and the wedding planner took care of it," she says. "Even though there were multiple weddings on my day, I felt like I was the only bride within miles." Melissa concurs: "I discussed most details over e-mail. It was practically finished before I even got there."

Know the Rules

Destination weddings can be a little more complicated than, say, driving to the state courthouse for your wedding license. Often, foreign countries mandate a time of residency before couples are allowed to legally wed. Leslie and her fiancé, Jason, wanted to get married in Tahiti. Unfortunately, the country requires 30 days of residency before marriage is allowed. Luckily, Jason suggested Hawaii. "It was halfway to our honeymoon in New Zealand, so it worked out well," Leslie says.

The Big... Week?

One of the best advantages of a destination wedding is the concept of wedding and vacation rolled into one. With stays as long you want (often between five days and three weeks), destination brides can take full advantage of the resort treatment. "Enjoy the spa," advises Melissa. "You're on vacation. Remember that." Mini-trips such as snorkeling, hiking and tourist outings can add to the intimacy of the small wedding, bringing you, your fiancé and your friends and family together for an unforgettable experience. Though these additions add to the cost of the all-inclusive resort, the memories are often worth it.

The wedding day usually comes towards the end of the trip for ultimate effect (and skipping over those annoying residency issues). Rachelle's wedding highlight was the carriage ride from the resort to the balcony overlooking the ocean. "Aaron was waiting for me, and I remember seeing lots of the hotel guests watching and waving. It was my Cinderella moment!" she says. Melissa remembers her wedding being everything she had imagined. "The resort had personalized menus for us and a champagne toast," she says. She and her husband even received a dining set as a gift from the resort two weeks after they returned from the Bahamas.

Leslie says that even though it was difficult for her to put her trust into a wedding planner she'd never met, the plans came together perfectly. "When we got to Hawaii, I realized she knew what she was doing," she says. "The local hairdresser was great."
Just make sure to carry the wedding dress onto the plane. You know, just in case.

A Hometown Happily Ever After

Many destination couples hold a reception back home where friends and family unable to attend can be a part of the wedding experience. But be careful: The cost of a large reception can get out of hand. Rachelle and her husband, Aaron, spent $5,000 total on their seven-day trip to Mexico. She says her reception alone (for 350 guests) cost more than that.

But sharing the events of your destination wedding often proves worth the expense. The Polodnas played a video of their wedding with their 80 reception guests, as did Leslie and Rachelle. Decorating the reception location with a theme of your destination wedding can also add to the ambiance. Placing enlarged photos of the wedding ceremony around the reception hall and displaying photo collages can also help your guests to feel like they're a part of your special experience. Often, homecoming receptions can become the icing on top of the destination wedding cake.

If you're contemplating a destination wedding, don't be afraid to look into it further by contacting a local travel agent or exploring resorts on the Internet. Often, pricing information is readily available, and having a planned budget can ease the decision-making process. Discuss the benefits and drawbacks of a destination wedding with your fiancé to ensure that both of you are fully informed and on board, together.